Time after time, I see the more successful managers doing something differently than colleagues.  They have made a habit of regularly checking in and talking with their employees.  These on-going check-ins foster a comfortable forum for communication and feedback.  In practical terms, effective managers hold individual “one-on-one” meetings with each direct report.  “Oh, no!  Not MORE meetings!” is a common reaction to this recommendation.

For many leaders, giving feedback to employees is the only thing harder than getting feedback.  “I don’t want to sound like a jerk” is how one new manager described the awkwardness of providing constructive feedback.  No matter the industry, organization, or level of position, giving feedback often makes leaders uncomfortable.  What happens when people get uncomfortable? Naturally, they procrastinate!

We’ve all had those moments that test our self-awareness. You know the one where someone says something about how they see you – either directly or through 360 feedback – and it just doesn’t match your self-image. “That’s not right – I don’t see myself that way!” We experience a fair amount of denial, but on some level, we fear the feedback might be true.

Some people have managers who readily offer useful feedback and coaching; many do not. People too often tell us that expectations are unclear and that they don’t know how to ask their manager for what they need to develop.

Leaders will often ask us, “How can I change my behavior?”  Or they ask us something which sounds like, “Do I really want to change behaviors that work for me?”  To change a behavior, we have to first see it and understand what works about it and what doesn’t.

Few things are more important to leadership than self-awareness. Self-awareness reveals what works and what does not work for us and helps us understand where we can add value and feel fulfilled. Self-awareness is also the foundation of emotional intelligence, which is essential to engaging others and fostering teamwork. The benefits of self-awareness are significant!